The Horizon

My thoughts are scattered these days. I've so many paths in front of me. Each one is appealing for one reason or another. I remember learning about Leonardo Divinci in high school. I thought, "That's how I want to be!" I want to explore everything and once I've mastered it, move on. I got it wrong. Davinci's gift wasn't in the quantity of his skills but the quality of his curiosity. I have many interests. I have no trouble kick-starting the path, learning the basics, and over-coming initial challenges. It's sticking with it, patiently wading through the slow tides, where I lose momentum. I can think of very few paths that have not strayed into the wood to be taken another day as Frost would say.

Recently, my mornings have not been met by my typical leap out of bed to feed the girls, drink coffee, get breakfast and get out to run, lift, or dog park before getting on with the day. I find myself lying there wondering what I want. I make coffee, read...some would say I was "Relaxing." It doesn't really feel that way- though it is peaceful. I don't seem to be coming to any conclusions. Though I'm the first to admit patience is not my strong suit...I'm thinking thinking is redundant and not really an activity. If I'm not coming to conclusions while specifically being still, and meanwhile feeling a bit stir crazy under the peace of rest, I need to get back to doing what I do best. I need to move. The answers will come when I am ready. Perhaps they are already there and I just need to notice them. Regardless. Starting seconds after I close this laptop, the girls and I are going outside, into the rain, and getting on with getting on. It's what we do. The rest will just have to fall into place. And as for Mr Davinci, my guess is he probably had a few short-term pursuits as well. Before he stumbled into science and art and the human form...he may have been a triathlete for a short stint. It didn't make his top ten, so we didn't hear about it. We just don't know. There are hobbies and then there are things that are just a part of who we are. Just like family, they will always be there, ready and willing to pick up where we left off. No judgement- just love, acceptance, and still so much to learn.